No quitter
POSTED AT 02:26 PM

duskee

My father attended the Christmas party of our subdivision today. And since he was alone, I decided to join him. He introduced me to one of our neighbors whose daughter is taking up Medicine in Cebu. You know what he said to me? He said, “ang bilis mo namang mag give up!” I didn’t know what papa told him. So I asked papa and he said he told the story of me not being accepted at PGH that’s why I didn’t go through with Medicine. That did make me sound like I gave up!

What’s my point?

I was hurt by that man’s comment. And I was hurt that he felt he had the right to give that comment based on my father’s account of what happened to me. I was hurt by how my father told the story. All my life, all I really ever wanted was to make my parents proud. I know they are too. But when people like that man could think that I gave up based on the story my father told him, could my father think that way too? I mean, how else could Mr. Neighbor interpret me not going to Med School as giving up if somewhere in my father’s story he hinted that I did?

Let the record show that I never really wanted to be a doctor. The only reason I took the NMAT was because I knew my father wanted me to at least try and be a doctor. I was never one of those kids who wished to be a doctor. And I will never wish to be one now or anytime in the future. Kudos to all those Med students. I know it’s hard. But it’s not for me. I only applied at UERM and PGH because I had to write down Med schools for the NMAT application. So I just pushed through with it. Of course I was disappointed that I didn’t get into PGH. But I made a deal with God. I told God I didn’t want to be a doctor, but if it is His plan that I be one, then I only want to study Med at PGH. I was actually both excited and scared when I received word that I was scheduled for interview at PGH. So me not being accepted at PGH only means God doesn’t want me to be a doctor. I got accepted at UERM. Of course, I didn’t go.

I have always been pretty much accepted at every institution I applied at. Except for PGH. And the Air Force.

All I really wanted to be was an Air Force pilot. To be just like my father. So when I was about to take the exam and they told me I couldn’t because I was a quarter of an inch short, which I’m not, my heart really did get broken. But I recovered from having my childhood dream shattered. I also laid that down into God’s hands. I know now I wasn’t meant to be an Air Force pilot, even if I dreamed to be one my whole life.

But no, I never gave up. I was never a quitter and I will never be one.

I love what I do now. And I thank God every day that He didn’t make me an Air Force pilot nor a Med student. My job completes me. It’s everything I really wanted for a career without me knowing it. I love being a field biologist. It is God’s graduation gift to me.

And while I’m in the field, and we’re hiking up the mountain, in the raid, slipping and sliding, being bit a thousand insects, feet so sore every step was torture, I never gave up…ever! Even when I was sick, I still woke up early, I still hiked to the observation post, I still did my job.

I never ever gave up. When I was taking up this summer enrichment class, darn it, there were days it was so painful it was total and complete agony, I never quit.

I am not a quitter. I hope no one thinks I am one. Especially my father, most especially him. Currently feeling: frustrated

BOYS!!
POSTED AT 09:15 AM

duskee

I am not a man-hater. But I just hate it, no, I loathe it when guys feel they're all powerful just because they hunt in packs.

Ok, so on my way to the office, there was a pack of three that came to me. The leader of this pack stared at me and said, "kaklase kita nuon, ang yabang mo na ngayon, hindi ka namamansin!" What kind of lame pick up line is that? First of all, my class was blocked all through out college, and I only had three male classmates. And I'm sure as hell he's not one of them. Second of all, I studied highschool at this small community school in Antipolo. I know all my classmates by heart, plus it's in Antipolo. And I'm sure as hell he's not one of them. Third, for elementary, I went to an all-girl's school in Marikina. Unless he had a sex change, I am sure as hell he's not one of them. Last, I went to preschool in another small community school in Antipolo. All my classmates were my neighbors. I grew up with these people. And I'm sure as hell he's not one of them. IDIOT!

And what is up with that whistling? And the pssst and the hoy? I mean, come on, I am not a dog. And I don't think I will ever be one. Even if you believe in evolution, it's still impossible for me to have been a dog because primates and canines come from different ancestral lines. That is no way to call me, or anyone, for that matter. Add to that the miss, miss calling technique. IDIOT!

Oh, and how they talk about you when you're in the jeepney, or standing in line, or eating somewhere. They don't know you but they try to get your attention by "subtly" talking about you. As if you're as stupid as they are! "Alam mo, gusto ko talaga yung babae na (they'll describe exactly what you're wearing). Pero alam mo suplada eh." Like hello, I don't know you. I have every right to be suplada! IDIOT!

And the lame ass miss anong oras na technique. HELLO!! Is that a watch you're wearing? IDIOT!

BOYS! As if they can do all that if they're alone. As if they can even talk to you when they're alone. They won't even stare at you. Stupid, stupid, idiots.

If they needed female attention, why don't they just go to their mothers and get it from them. Or their sisters, or aunts, female cousins, hookers. Just don't get it from me. Cause you won't get it.

I'm not saying all men are like that. I'm just talking about the lower-than-scum-foul-excuse-for-human-beings that I'm sure we've all encountered in our lives.

Hmm... I did say I have a dark side didn't I? For happier thoughts... click this. Currently feeling: annoyed

POSTED AT 08:23 PM

duskee

advanced happy birthday sa asawa ni peaches. hehehe...

belated happy birthday sa kahonista... hmmm...

Asleep
POSTED AT 10:33 AM

duskee

It's asleep... my dark side is aslepp. Now ain't that a relief.

But I think all of my side are asleep.

Happy! Happy! Currently listening to: The Beatles's Come Together
Currently feeling: blank

Gotcha!
POSTED AT 02:00 PM

duskee

The dark side awakens!

Why are they blaming me for what happened? I was doing her job.

I just hate working with people who live in the world of the impossible, who think that work can't be done if you have to exert a bit of effort. Actually, come to think of it, I dislike anyone like that.


Anyhoo... Happy thoughts... hehehe... Currently feeling: aggravated

Gaaa!
POSTED AT 02:41 AM

duskee

What a way to start the new year! My pc keeps on freezing, I can't access my internet account, I had this long entry for tabulas and then my pc froze, and blogger won't open. Bugger! Oh well... I'll just do it again tomorrow.. umm... later today pala.